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Two brilliant teenagers head a team of young geniuses developing a laser for what they believe is a class project. When they find out that their professor intends to turn their work over to the government for use as a weapon, they decide to ruin his plans.

A beautician in America (Drescher) is mistakenly thought to be an academic teacher by a representative of an Eastern European dictator (Dalton). She is invited to their country on that mistaken belief and is asked to be the tutor of the dictator’s children. While there, she tries to Westernize the whole country.

A priest from the Vatican is sent in to investigate claims that a small town in Brazil has a church where statues bleed from the eyes. Meanwhile, a young woman in the U.S. begins to show signs of stigmata, the wounds of Christ. The priest from the Vatican links up with her and cares for her as she is increasingly afflicted by the stigmata. Her ranting and raving finally begins to make sense to the priest who starts to question what his religion has stood for for the last 1900 years.

Sassy postgrad Elle Woods (Witherspoon) is all about animal rights. In fact, she puts her nuptial plans on hold to head to Washington D.C. to get an anti-animal testing bill passed. Her building’s doorman (Newhart) quickly shows her the ways and workings of our nation’s capital.