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Down and out rock star Dewey Finn (Black) gets fired from his band, and he faces a mountain of debts and depression. He takes a job as a 4th grade substitute teacher at an uptight private school where his attitude and hijinx have a powerful effect on his students. He also meets Zack, a 10-year-old guitar prodigy, who could help Dewey win a “battle of the bands” competition, which would solve his financial problems and put him back in the spotlight.

Max (Weaver) and Page (Hewitt) are a mother and daughter con team. Max seduces wealthy men into marrying her, then Page seduces them into infidelity so Max can rake them over the divorce court coals. And then it’s on to the next victim.

Ted was a geek in high school, who was going to go to the prom with one of the most popular girls in school, Mary. The prom date never happened, because Ted had a very unusual accident. Thirteen years later he realizes he is still in love with Mary, so he hires a private investigator to track her down. That investigator discovers he too may be in love with Mary, so he gives Ted some false information to keep him away from her. But soon Ted finds himself back into Mary’s life, as we watch one funny scene after another.

Glen Canyon, Arizona, the present day. Wayne, practising at night in the desert for his upcoming fireman’s exam, witnesses the impact of a meteorite. The next day, biology teacher Dr. Ira Kane and geology teacher Harry Block from Glen Canyon Community College manage to get to the meteorite, which is stuck in the ground at the bottom of a cave. By taking a sample, they discover a slimy blue fluid coming out of the meteorite. A little later, Ira Kane finds out that myriads of single-celled life-forms dwell in the fluid, evolve at an incredible rate, even while he’s watching. What first seems like a sure ticket to Sweden for the Nobel Prize soon develops into a nightmare: By evolving and adapting at that unbelievably fast rate, the Aliens start spreading out, and the Military comes in. Now it all comes down to what Darwin so rightfully stated: Survival of the fittest. And no good idea in sight…