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A naive, bumbling veterinarian named Corky Romano the outcast son if a Mafia boss, is recruited by his family to infiltrate the FBI and steal any and all evidence that will put his cranky father named Francis A. “Pops” Romano in jail! But he’s in way over his head when he’s made out to be a super agent. It’s a reputation must live up to as he tries to fake his way through one tough assignment after another while hunting for the elusive incriminating proof of his father’s illegal activities.

More than 300 years ago, 3 witches were sentenced to die in Salem, Massachusetts and a boy was turned into a cat (a black cat, naturally). Now it’s Halloween, and the witches (who fly on [I kid you not] vacuum cleaners) are back. This time, they’ve got their eyes on immortal life and have turned their wrath on trick-or-treaters and it’s up to the 300-year-old cat to save the day.

A newspaper photographer, Jean, researches the lurid and sensational axe murder of two women in 1873 as an editorial tie-in with a brutal modern double murder. She discovers a cache of papers that appear to give an account of the murders by an eyewitness. The plot weaves between the narrative of the eyewitness and Jean’s private struggle with jealousies and suspicions as her marriage teeters.

Nicole broke up with Matt months ago and is now engaged to someone else. He’s very good-looking and has no trouble finding other lovers, but that doesn’t help because he’s still obsessed with wanting her back. Then he gets the inspiration that swearing off sex for Lent (all forms of sexual activity, even kissing or masturbation) will give him the perspective he needs. So of course a few days later he meets a woman and they fall in love. Now Matt sees his vow as a personal matter, and won’t even tell her about it, but his friends think otherwise, and now the complications begin…

Sexual jolts disrupt Manhattan physician Bill Harford’s equilibrium. At an elegant Christmas party, two “models” hit on him, he watches a Lothario try to pick up his tipsy wife, he aids a woman sprawled naked in a bathroom after an overdose. The next night, his wife reveals sexual fantasies with a stranger; a dead patient’s daughter throws herself at him; as he walks, brooding, six teen boys hurl homophobic insults at him; a streetwalker takes him to her flat; he interrupts men having a sex party with a girl barely in her teens. His odyssey, which next takes him into a world of wealthy sex play at a masked ball of hedonism, threatens his life, his self-respect, and his marriage.